It is hard to be patient when you feel like you are doing all the right stuff and still feel like crap. I have noticed that addicts are not the most patient people on the planet anyway
, myself included.
I went through opiate w/d cold turkey @ home a little over 6 months ago. In retrospect, I wish I had consulted an addiction specialist (MD). There were times in the 3 - 5 week range that I wondered if I had damaged something; maybe I gave myself a heart attack - that's why I am so weak, can't eat, heart rate still high, can't sleep, etc.? Surely just w/d wouldn't make me this sick for this long!
Wrong! But I started to slowly see that I was feeling a little better soon thereafter, and "lived to tell the story". I guess the best things (i.e. sobriety) are worth fighting the hardest for, and this certainly fits the bill.
Sometimes I wonder if our higher power (for me, God) had made w/d so miserable that it will be impossible to forget, giving us incentive not to put ourselves through it again. I know the reality is that relapse is a possibility for any addict, but I truely can not envision putting myself (& my family) through this again.
Anyway, try to pamper yourself as much as possible. I don't know any sure way to make the process go faster. I remember taking a lot of hot baths. It was the end of summer and still very hot, so there would be times I would go down to the river and float. Or just be outside to breath some fresh air and meditate. I never had done meditation before --- learned it in an outpatient program - & it was extremely helpful to settle my mind and re-focus. The entire outpatient program really did save me, I believe; have you looked into any in NC?
I'll be praying for you. YOU CAN DO THIS!!! Let me know if I can help.
Red