To support and echo all of the statements above, you must find someone experienced in helping families in crisis related to addiction.
My daughter being apprehended and charged for underage drinking is ironically one of the best things that happened to us as a family. The juvenile court system placed her in counseling with a woman who has seen and supported many, many teens affected by alcoholism in the home. She helped my daughter understand the source of her anger and insecurity and she helped me face what I had avoided dealing with. But again it must be someone who understands addiction issues.