I will echo ultradad's comments, because I thought the same thing.
"I have not vocally told anyone my struggles. I have become very good at hiding it."
Yeah, do I know about that!! Until I started talking openly to others face to face (for me, the venue for that was AA, where I could be comfortable and not fear judgement) - I did not make any progress with sobriety.
Then, even AFTER that... then stopping AA and deciding I could certainly moderate, I went on for another year and a half. Most of that year and a half - actually almost two - was spent in various 'secret' attempts to control my drinking. It didn't work. It got progressively worse. It was all the things that 'they' said in AA... all the things I've heard in others' stories... it was a pattern and I was watching it happen - helplessly. Until I was "exposed" in an incident where I could not pretend or hide anymore, and went back to AA and humbly told people the truth - I was stuck.
But, when I did that.... it began to work. That was over 6 months ago.
And things are really, really good.