I was intentionally raised without any faith. None. We celebrated all of the Christian holidays but only because they were tradition not because of anything religious.
I struggle with the concept of a higher power giving a crap about me. How can God, this infinite all powerful being care about my problems when there are starving children, babies and children with terminal diseases, people being trafficked for sex slavery, prisoners of war, etc. and then me. White girl problems in suburbia. I understand the concept of prayer but the actual act of praying feels so incredibly foreign to me. It's super awkward. Like "hey, God, it's me again. I need to ask you for MORE stuff, again. Please fix the world's problems. And thank you. By the way, thank you for all of the great, amazing, wonderful blessings that I have in life and I'm sorry that I ask you for things via prayer more than I thank you for stuff via prayer but I kind of forget to pray unless I need things or unless someone asks me to pray for them because they need things. Thanks. Again. Amen."
For me personally, I've totally stumbled around and come to my own religious understanding but I can't even really articulate what I believe. I took a religious philosophy class in college and was really intrigued by Judaism but being raised by a NPD mom I'm honestly really self conscious of wanting to pursue Judaism because it's not as popular of a religion as Christianity. Crazy, huh?
Even crazier, I actually became Catholic and did Pre Cana when my husband and I became engaged because being married in a Catholic Church was important to his parents and that made him feel pressured into making it happen. So I'm actually Catholic but I think Catholicism is soooooo against some stuff that I stand for, like why can't a woman be the Pope? And if you actually bring this stuff up with other Catholics it's like you just told them that their mom is ugly. Go along to get along.
At this point, I believe in a God. But I'm not exactly sure what my relationship with God is or what rules I believe that exactly surround God. I'm much more curious about historical stuff than the actual present day connection with a higher power. For me, meditating is a more powerful connection with something, whatever that something is, the universe I guess, than God.