Deep breathes blossom.
This must be a real curve ball....but it sounds like you are really clear about what you want for your daughter and for yourself. Of course you don't want to see someone suffer, especially someone you once loved, and maybe still love. But you and your daughter are important. I get the anxiety....try some of the techniques you've learned to self soothe to be able to get some clarity in your thinking and to help you stay on this wonderful pathway that YOU have created to the future you want and deserve.