It has now been a week since I told him he has to leave - for good this time. He has had his moments of "oh God, I can't WAIT for my freedom" comments but good LORD, he has been around more in the last 7 days than the last 7 months. Now, I took the truck keys but honestly, for a year and a half prior to his return, he had no vehicle and had NO problem getting around. Today he got some money in his pocket so he (of course, so predictable) got a buddy to pick him up to "go look at work" LOL!! I am at my wits end and really just venting here.
I told my boys I asked him to leave and why. They were as prepared as they could be and then HE DOESN'T GO ANYWHERE! He did "go out" on Saturday night and I told him if he could afford to do that then he should be able to afford to move...not that I wanted him here, I just didn't want to be awakened at 12, or 1 or 2 or whenever AND if he wants his freedom then his a** should be taking every dime and saving it for his move.
It is such a flipping mess. There are glimpses of that old guy that was a sweetheart and seemed to care BUT he is so totally different now. Seems the years of additional addiction have added to his "jerkness". I've heard him say a few times this week "love you or love you guys"....does he not realize I want to vomit when I hear that? It is SUCH A LIE...and I know that what anyone else thinks of me is none of my business but it irritates the hell out of me that I look like the "bad guy" or the "judgemental bit**" or the 'ungrateful one" to whomever he can spew his story to.
The joy inside is starting to return though....I know there's a light at the end of the tunnel, today it just seems like the tunnel is longer than I was hoping.