Katie88,
My heart goes out to you, ...because I've been in the same place myself. Once I grabbed on to sobriety, everything slowly began changing. Not only my circumstances , but the way I saw life through a different lens.
I can still remember thinking ; ..."damn, has it been this easy for everybody all along"
I was blinded to the major handicap I was throwing in my own path, ...for years.
Cow is right about just getting to some support meeting. Someone will find you who understands.
Take care, and keep the faith in these early days KT,
We've all been through it, ...and it's so worth it
TS