Nuudawn will be able to relate to this.
It's like the 250 pound woman who is trying to lose weight and "can't" get below 200. Every time she gets to 201, she gives up and goes back to her old ways because she's never been able to do it before. I've seen people do this for YEARS! She's convinced she can't.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't - you're right.
If you're tired of failing, stop giving up.