I'm sorry to hear that AO. I can totally relate. I also have anxiety and hate crowds. I now live in the middle of nowhere which is the best thing I;ve ever done but appreciate this is neither practical or possible for others.
I understand you not wanting to take meds for anxiety but surely meds prescribed by a doc are better than drinking.
I've also had the 1/2 glasses of wine after a period of sobriety and it helped.Until it didn't. Even if I just had 1 or 2 one day it didn't take long for me to up the intake and frequency until I was back to where I was before. I don't know how long you had been sober before this but it does get better. I'm 18 months now and rarely have anxiety so bad I want to drink. but it took a long time to get here- for many many months it felt like it was getting worse before it got better, but it does get better