[QUOTE]
Originally Posted by
dandylion 
Chicory--I hate to think of the paper that I have wasted in writing up plans and contracts and agreements and "rules"--when my adult son was living in the house--on and off, over the years with me and my sweet husband (who passed suddenly).
Dandylion,
my 'list' isn't for him to read.... its just putting down on paper, my plan of action.
I learned that if you make a boundary--you had better be willing and able to enforce it!
Yes, that is the tricky part of all of this.
Certainly, I don't know all the particulars about your situation---but I get a feeling that you are proceeding with little to no help.......?
Am I mistaken about this....?
You're 100% right .. no help, because unless I am ready for my son in law to throw him into the street, there isn't much else anyone can do.
His dad lives 1000 miles away, and he and his wife do not care... they tried their 'token' help and are done. they have lives to live, and good for them. His dad never did anything for his kids anyway.
and yes, I do need help, from SR. It is my only help. my daughters have no idea what to do either.
my heart is so heavy this morning. and I feel so pressured and hopeless. He was high last evening, and up all night. Heaven knows what he does in his room, but it is depressing the heck out of me, to feel so powerless. For some reason, reading inspirational quotes online only made me feel more sad.
It is so hard. As a child of alcoholic parents, I lived so unhappily and with such chaos all the time, I guess my tolerance of a##holes is high, and maybe I even feel it is my lot in life. I know that is NOT true, but still, I think it happens to ACA's. Like it is normal and just a fact of life. to suffer because of the choices of those we love. it stinks.
I will be alright. Having a rough time this morning. guess the reality of it all is overwhelming me.
I need to realize that just because I have not done the right things so far does not mean that I cannot do them.
