Is this grieving?
Strange question I know but today I saw my husband. He came by to visit the kids and before he came I could feel my anxiety levels rising. When he arrived he walked straight in, sat on the sofa and said hello to the dog! He hadnt been drinking but I sat and looked at him and was overwhelmed by a feeling of loss. I had to lock myself in the bathroom so the kids didnt see me crying. I feel I have been doing that a lot the past couple of days-crying. I have been strong and smiled through so much for the kids sake but I now feel I have no control over my emotions. It feels as though I am grieving for someone. I look at my husband and know I have lost the man I married. The man I loved so dearly, the man I shared so much with and the man I chose to be my kids father. It is such a gutt wrenching feeling of loss. I tell myself that I will feel better another day and to just go with it and feel what I feel for each day. Maybe it is a sort of grieving process, I dont know, I feel so confused sometimes. Has anyone else felt this too? xpinkyx