Hi SallyTaylor,
I can't say I was married to my exabf, but we did live together - on and off because the relationship was on and off and everytime he moved his stuff out, I lost it. I didn't lose it in front of him, but I certainly called up a number of friends and cried like a big baby. I would walk around the house and all at once want to get rid of everything that reminded me of him, but also relish in how his clothes used to be in those drawers or how he used to like sitting here or there. It was bad.
When I finally decided I had enough to did not get back together with him, he got all his things and left and instead of leaving they keys on the counter (the front door locks upon exit), he went to the leasing office and had them call me informing me he was returning his keys. What made it worse was he was not on the lease, merely listed as a tenant and they started questioning me if I knew he was moving out and they sounded so confused as to why they were getting the key and not me. I was mortified. After that phone call, I lost it. I cried and cried. And everytime he moved out, he always left some kind of sentimental symbolic message, which pissed me off even more! Because that was his way of keeping me on a leash. Those symbols always gave me hope and I hated that.
So long story short - yes, it's natural to lose it. There is something about it becoming real that is really difficult to deal with. Part of me wanted everything to end as quickly as possible and part of me did not. I didn't know how to be with him and I didn't know how to be without him. It's a bad, bad cycle.