((((meggy))))
I'm so glad you're reaching out and posting for help!!
Reread this past thread:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...right-now.html
Going through that, is there anything you've tried or been doing that has helped in the past? Are there things that may help that haven't been tried yet? The hotline numbers are usually staffed 24/7, so call them when you need someone to talk to. Especially the self harm ones. Write down the numbers on a piece of paper and keep it with you, put it in your cell phone, and/or write it where you might cut.
The process of healing often drudges up so much of the past. It often needs to be worked out in order to move forward, but so very often requires help in guiding that.
I'm glad you have things lined out for Monday. Are there any meetings close enough to drive to tonight or sometime tomorrow and again on Sunday? Include in your search meetings for DV, Alanon, Celebrate Recovery, self-harm, AA open meetings or anything else that may catch your attention. The idea is to get through the door, be with others who care and be able to sit back and listen for a bit. To get outside our own problems and also pick up something that helps us deal with our own problems.
