"I don't have a desire to alleviate my x's distress, I can't.
I meant no harm here, I retract my posts. Katiekatie,"
I understood what you meant, I just thought the use of the word might be overlooking the dangerous side of compassion for those of us who love addicts. We tend to overstep on the "alleviating distress" thing. It's part of how addiction makes us sick.
Sympathy might be the word we're looking for. Sympathy can mean "feeling sorry for someone else's troubles," which is kind of useless, but it can also mean "understanding between people; common feeling."
Every once in a while someone posts something on this the board that just blows me away, makes me see things in a whole new way. Maybe this is sympathy, because the person certainly doesn't know me, but they understand and put into words something that I feel, experience, and need to understand in order to grow.
I think this "sympathy" factors in in recovery centers and 12-step meetings too.
I wonder however if a non-addict can really have true sympathy for/with an addict? Or they for us?