You will figure it out, Jimi. And at only 26, there is no goal in life that has long since passed. It seems you recognize the brokenness of your current relationship. Perhaps you should take a break and go live with dad for a few months, give up the weed and any other substances, keep up with your counseling, and take a sabbatical of sorts to think things through without undue outside influences.
I am sorry about your mom. It sounds like she fell under a witches spell, if you ask me. I know of such women. I also dont think you will be satisfied until you have more answers, and I dont blame you, given the circumstances.
Peace to yiu, my friend. One last piece of advice; give this up in prayer daily. God will lead you in His right direction.