Good morning, albeit a tired one. I did not sleep well last night, as usual, and I'm fighting the urge to have a 4th cup of coffee.
Areyoukitten: I also plan on cutting back on the coffee. My goal is to slowly work toward only one cup per day and then possibly replace it with something else sometime in the future.
Obosob: I often feel panicked while driving. It gets really bad within the few days after a night of drinking. Sometimes I am scared to drive.
rockstonic: that was really brave of you to go to the ER. I'm glad that you were able to make that reality check for those around you.
I don't want to bite off more than I can chew at this point in time, but my decision to abstain from drinking is just one part of the lifestyle shift I am making. Yes, it is a major part. I'm sick of feeling like I am wasting my life by not reaching my mental/physical potential. I worry myself sick over everything constantly. I have low self esteem about my physical and mental state. When I drink it makes me feel better. But then it makes me feel worse for way longer than it made me feel better.
Well, I thought I'd share something really simple that has been helping me:
I've read that when you are trying to make positive changes in your life it helps to think "What has worked for me in the past?" . I started thinking about that and remembered a time about 5 years ago when I was trying to lose baby weight from my daughter. I bought one of those cheap little planners that you can find at the dollar store. In it, I kept track of my weight and exercise. I stuck to it, and I'm not one to stick to things. It worked and I quit after I reached my goal.
Well I decided to buy another planner. I have been writing in it mostly every night for the past couple weeks. I write my plans and goals for the following day. I don't get detailed. I simply put what I have to do and what I want to do. I also sometimes add things to the list that I did that day that weren't planned. If I do not accomplish something I planned to that day, I cross it out and write it again for the next day. After crossing something out and writing it again a few days in a row, you really want to get it done (For instance organizing the computer desk that I've been meaning to do for weeks). I have been consistently exercising and I believe that this has helped. It also helps me keep track of when I did certain things like household tasks.
I have tried keeping planners online multiple times and I never stick to it. There's something about writing it out and making it personal that really helps me. And when it's online it's really easy to forget about. Out of sight out of mind. I really enjoy being able to look back on the days and being able to know what happened and when. It's gratifying too to see the positive things that I've done. I plan on keeping track of everything significant that happens even if it's negative but so far it's all been good. I know that if I slip up I will have to record it in my beloved planner and I really don't want to taint it with that!
OK enough with the caffeine fueled rambling...