Hi Thankful,
I've got 245 days sober now and I'll say that for me sobriety has been an emotional roller coaster. I have a hard time coping with some things, mostly uncertainty, you know, things that I can't control. I have dark moments in which I have thought of suicide. I fully realize I'm too chicken to follow through, but the thoughts come. I also have times when I get myself so worked up about things I can't control, that all I think about is picking up and drinking for some temporary relief.
When I think of picking up, I have to rationally think it through. Think of what the results and aftermath of drinking again would be. That's been enough to scare me away from drinking.
I intend to stay sober for the rest of my life and most of the time I remain hopeful and optimistic about the future. I had a period of 8.5 years sober prior to my latest one year relapse and those were great years in which I was very happy. I expect I'll be back to that place again.
Coming here to SR, which I just joined a couple of days ago, is a big help to me. Reading about others experiencing the same issues and all is calming. I also attend 5 or more AA meetings a week and have made great friends in AA, including my sponsor. They are a great support team.
Keep the chin up!