I've rarely posted but I'm here every day sucking up as much ESH as possible.
Daughter still on methadone with a year old baby with serious medical issues. He's survived 3 open heart surgeries & seems to be doing pretty well at the moment. Expecting another OHS in about 6 mos. Baby's Dad is on suboxone & has his own serious medical issues. In the past month, Dad has been admitted to the hospital at least 5x, due to not taking care of his condition. (My thoughts: his over use of his meds might have helped "cloud" his mind) I find him useless but that's another novel.
They are moving this weekend. The last time my daughter moved was one of the worst weekends of my life. She was high & pregnant, he was high. Moving was not on their radar. It was a nightmare & I don't want to even go back there. Ughhhh!
Back to today. For WEEKS I've been reminding my daughter to start packing. Weed through the babies clothes...I'll take anything she wants to save, special things, etc & store them here. Has she? No.
I've also reminded her that I will not be helping them move. I got silence. Still spent time with the baby & tried to keep my mouth shut with the parents. So this past Monday I get a text about them moving this weekend. I remind her that I've told her NO. Got a flurry of texts telling me what an awful grandmother I am...how could I not help, etc., etc. I shut my phone off.
His mom (SHE IS CLUELESS RE: addiction....I mean CLUELESS) had rented a U Haul truck but they had no one to drive it. (I can't drive it even if I wanted to) Hmmmm....Daughter calls because the dad has dropped AGAIN & is in hospital. Perfect timing, once again. My mind starts churning of how I MIGHT help...but I remind myself of the last move & how these 2 need to STEP IT UP. She texts me yesterday & says Dad is out of the hospital but kinda in a fog (over use of meds pops in my mind but I say nothing) Well he's going to be a big help moving....So I say...Why didn't his mom call movers (like I did the past 2 moves) I give her the movers name & #. They call them & I THINK they have that figured out.
They are moving today. I live over 100 miles away. I'm in my fifties. They live in Boston. Boston Marathon is Monday. Boston is jammed packed with the runners & the media due to last year's Marathon. Sunday is Easter. People are traveling for Easter. I did offer to take the baby til Sunday night but was told no because I live too far from a major hospital.
Other grandmother is...well not very grandmotherly...she throws $$$, not love. When baby was hospitalized, she would come to take parents out to lunch/dinner but rarely come up to baby's room. She claimed it was too upsetting. When her son was nodding out, standing by baby's hospital crib, she claimed he was TIRED. He also slept for 12 hours after an important procedure right in the baby's hospital room & when he was woken up in a fog..she just escorted him to her house because he needed to EAT & SLEEP. ???? I've bent over backwards for these 2 - sleeping in his hospital room overnight so they could go home & rest, babysitting, etc while I don't think she's ever even changed his diaper! They are moving to her house. Don't see how this is going to work out but not my problem. I'd take the baby...but not the parents!!!!
I would like to spend my free time at home with my husband. (He is not her father & they don't get along) I would like to have a nice Easter dinner at home. They knew their lease was up today. They are adults. They should have planned this move better.
My main concern is the baby but since I was told that I can't take him while they move....that's the best I could offer in this situation.
I know in my head saying no was the best thing to do for me but I just need to hear it from someone who knows what I'm going though....
