I have found the answer to all of these questions. It took me almost 11 months to find it but I did.
You ask them one very honest question. It's a sincere question and implies nothing. Even better, it often shuts them up.
"Does it bother you if I'm not drinking?"
Be very inquisitive when you ask, raise an eyebrow if necessary.
The responses have been interesting. Some say "It does" and then I ask why.
Believe me, it's a short lived conversation and they never ask again.
