I think I am going to take your guidance and really use the time wisely.
Yes I am concerned I will be pushed and pulled back in.. If that next storm comes
The past -there were a few forces that kept me staying and trying.
Myself the caregiver, do the right thing believe and hope for the good in everyone (forgive give another chance anad repeat)
The pleading and empty promises of my AH
His family's guilt and reassurances if I would just stay and stay positive and not dwell in what happened (even though it was just the week before) the premises of wipe the slate clean each time and me bringing up anything "old" even if it was only a week past was not letting it go or finding forgiveness. This leads to a 4th pressure your faith and questioning your ability to give people second chances ( even if it was actually the 50th)
And then the friends... This time is different...give him a chance. Problem was we hid so many years of it. The one more chance thing was on a boat that had already sailed.
Peace helps, quiet helps...
And I have to stop thinking the worse is coming .. We already made it through that...
I see a lot of people on this board have experienced close calls with the hospital visits and DUIs and blackouts.
Sometimes I am surprised we are even alive. That is what I think will help stop me from getting sucked back in again... And that my little family needs to experience continued peace. It is so new and nice I want to keep it!!!!