Thank you everyone for the reassurance and kinds words. I'm just so angry with myself because I knew I would drink during the trip. I caved so easily. As soon as I got through security I headed straight for the bar and then didn't stop until last night even though I was back home. I was doing ok before the trip. Was up to 2 weeks sober. All down the drain thanks to my pathetic behavior. Day 1 starts today. Hoping its also day 1 of not being a sad human being.