Originally Posted by
howie2092 
What exactly changed that made things different? Did you lose weight or become less depressed, or did you just start telling yourself a simplistic platitude that 'things are better'?
Hi, one big difference was I finally began letting go of resentments. These resentments caused me great anxiety. I had a lot of anger at my father for the way he raised us which was basically verbal terrorism on a daily basis for 18+ years. I looked at his life and his hardships (growing up in boarding schools since his mother died at age 5) and forgave him. I knew I had to let it go or I'd never get sober.
Also, the anxiety from hangovers in the end was so bad that I started having panic attacks. Basically, the alcohol stopped working for me as the solution. Instead of escaping anxiety, it was making it much worse. That in itself made staying sober so much easier than any past attempts.