Welcome. I am glad you found us. You don't need to be elligable to go to Alanon, if someone you care about is drinking and it is bothering you, you can absolutely go and it will likely help you.
Now, I am going to say what you don't want to hear. When they are lying and drinking that seriously you likely only know the tip of the iceberg. The three C's are, you did not cause it, you cannot control it, and you cannot cure it. You have children and need to put their needs first. Do some reading on here and see what life with children and alcoholics are like. It is not fun.
Please please take care of yourself, analyze what would be best for you and your children and make decisions that are best for you.
Good Luck and God Bless.