Hi Postcard.
Maybe you should address this letter to you? Your promises or mission statement is with you to hold yourself accountable for your recovery.
The kindest thing for your wife is to let her go peacefully IMO.
I'm on the other side of the fence. I woke up this am with some of the lyrics of Don Henley's Heart of the Matter in my head. I might not have it exactly right, "But I think it's about forgiveness, forgiveness -Even if, even if you don't love me anymore."