I'm glad you made your way back here.
"it's all or nothing when it comes to quitting. and whether you have a day, week, or month under your belt of "handling it" you can never predict when you will take it too far one day for know explainable reason."
I think you need to keep this in the front of your memory. It will help you get through the tough days. And remember, it's one day at a time.