Hi CAH,
I live in Michigan too and I know the gray days don't help! I have been in your shoes but believe me being sober is so much better! I am going on four months and finally have my sense of humor back! I avoided triggers by trying to replace them with reading and drawing. It is tough for sure. I have some good reads if you are interested! Warrior of the light, The scariest places, and I love the book Daring Greatly by Brene' Brown. That and music too. If you can get out for some air when it is sunny that helps too. I love to re-decorate so that drives my family crazy but helps me create some fun times for myself too! I do see a counselor and do go to AA once a week as well, but reading and writing in a journal helps too. I get crabby and irritated easy but try to soften my delivery a little, I am hoping for a job at a vet clinic as a vet tech, good people and puppies help too! Don't beat yourself up keep trying, you can do it, I have faith in you, and don't hesitate to come here and chat, there is a lot of love here!