I haven't gotten these "recommendations" from a counselor, because we of course HAVE NEVER GONE (and like many others, I have grave doubts about marriage counseling with an active drinker...although if I was to try it, it would be with someone with expertise in addiction).
BUT...I have gotten them from my AH. He wants constant affirmation when he drinks less, or doesn't drink for a few days, or washes a dish, or sweeps the floor. Like FireSprite, it ENRAGES me to feel like I have to pat him on the back every five seconds. Maybe it would feel easier if he was actually seeking recovery, but the whole thing is just a load of crap when he's actively drinking and refusing to acknowledge his problem. I also hate feeling like my AH's mother. One reason I fell in love with my AH was because I DIDN'T feel that way (after 11 years of marriage to my first husband, not an A, but a man who I mothered all the time). I welcomed the change and this self-sufficient, productive, enthusiastic, helpful, kind man into my life. I refuse to go back to mothering, now that my once-awesome husband has relapsed.
I will say one thing about therapists' recommendations, though. When I was in solo therapy during my divorce from my first husband, I found that there were two times when my therapist's suggestion pissed me off. Sometimes, it was because I honestly felt she didn't understand where I was coming from and where I wanted to be. But more often than not, it was because I wasn't comfortable identifying and calling out my flaws that were raised by her suggestion. This was after we had developed a strong and productive therapist/client relationship, and I trusted her. If you have developed a strong relationship with your therapist and trust him/her, then I think it's worth at least asking yourself WHY a suggestion/recommendation bothers you. Sometimes that kind of self-inquiry leads you to discover something new about YOURSELF, which is a wonderful thing!