What does another person's mood, tone of voice, or state of inebriation have to do with my course of action? Nothing, unless I decide otherwise.
For example, I have learned that arguing with someone who is intoxicated is like beating my head against a brick wall. Yet, until recently, I would always dive right into the arguments, because that was what the other person seem to want. In Al-Anon I discovered that I don't have to react just because I have been provoked, and I don't have to take harsh words to heart. I can remember that they are coming from someone who may be in pain, and try to show a little compassion. I certainly don't have to allow them to provoke me into doing anything I don't want to do.
Today's Reminder
Detachment with love means that I stop depending upon what others do, say, or feel to determine my own well-being or to make my decisions. When faced with other people's destructive attitudes and behavior, I can love their best, and never feared their worst.
"…Detachment is not caring less, it's caring more for my own serenity."
~…In All Our Affairs