Originally Posted by
spacestation 
I'm in Hell for sure.
behind the guy who created auto correct.
OK I told someone else this is it. So My day one is now.
Really, umm, My Dad just passed away suddenly. Last 2 weeks. Really my best friend in the world.
And I have drank an amount that is just an abomination.
I saw him and then my car broke down, not worth fixing, but some really strange things have been happening, Stuff I would never believed could.
It has me in a way that I think I cant kick it. And I have made sure it's true. 30years of hard drinking has....I don't know who I am without it.
I am jonsing already.
I'm sorry for your loss. I understand how that feels. I lost my Dad suddenly too, when I was 18, which would lead me down a sad trail for years to come, until I finally woke up to it.
If all the drinking in the world would solve our problems, then I'd say, "Go for it!" All it does is hold us hostage, when there's no need for it. Hey, FREE yourself.
Think about this. Do you think it would make your Dad happy, if he knew you were tormenting yourself over his loss? It was his time to go, just like it was for my Dad.
Think about your life being taken, and the one's left behind who love you. How would it make you feel, watching them HURT themselves, because it was your time to go. It wouldn't feel so good would it?
Acceptance can be a tricky thing, but that's what it boils down to. We need to accept things we have no control over.
Hold the happy memories close to you, those are the best.
Make your Dad smile today, let him know you're going to be ok. He wants you to enjoy life the best way you can, and not HURT yourself
Take care of yourself. I too live in a brutally cold place. Yowy!!!