I'm trying to decide what action to take. either help him or not be with him
Has he even asked for your help with his drinking problem?
You set a healthy boundary for yourself by telling him you no longer wish to be around him when he drinks, which you say is everyday. If he does not seek help and get sober then he's rejected you for the bottle. That's extremely hard to accept, very painful. Often we hold onto their empty words because dealing with that kind of hurt and rejection is just to painful.
Valentines day was 5 days ago and he says he went to a meeting but still can't meet with you because he's still drinking. That's not what someone who wants to stop drinking with all their heart, looks like.