welcome Truedark....
Maybe I'll refer to you as LightofTruth.... that seems to create a bit more positive intent.
But kidding aside this post you've made can be the tipping point, the turning point, the point of return, the point of creation, the point at which you finally are ready to move into the LIGHT of a better, happier, fuller life than ever you imagined.
I'm sorry that you find yourself in so dark a place and I wish you strength and conviction and peace as you climb out of it. Get yourself some 'in person' support if you can. AA / NA are great tools if you're open to them....
We're here for you and you don't have to live in darkness anymore.
