Resentment/Am I over reacting?
Hello,
I am over 9 months sober using a variety of recovery methods including SR and AA. As part of AA I have taken my steps and am currently working on step 9. I have recently made my amend to my husband and am trying to move forward. However, I continue to find that I am getting mucked up in the past.
Case in point: When I was still drinking my husband took my car keys away to his car which I had had ever since we had the car. I was doing a lot of drunk driving so at the time this was understandable. However, at this point he still has not given me the keys back to his car. It is really starting to bother me and I know this is a trust issue, but I am also wondering if this is a control issue on his part?
Another issue was that he took away my phone and hid it for several days (after finding several unsavory texts on it) at a time when I was still drinking and wouldn't give it back to me until I threatened to go and buy a new phone. He has not done this is over a year but I am still holding on to that resentment.
Finally there was also a time when he did not wear his wedding ring for 6 months because he told me that he didn't feel like my husband. This was also while I was drinking. A chunk of time has passed since this but I am holding on to that resentment as well.
Does anyone have advice on how to let go of these resentments? Am I over or under reacting? Curious if anyone else went through anything similar and how did you handle it? Thanks, PG