Originally Posted by
WhoDey 
Question for those of you with more sober time than myself. I'm at approximately 3.5 months.
Early on, I'd have relatively intense cravings which I would urge-surf until they passed. Over time, these cravings diminished significantly.
Recently, I've been having not intense cravings, but more of low-level "gee, it would be nice to sip one drink" type of thoughts. Difficult for me to describe, but I'm wondering if it's due to either boredom with sobriety (the heavy lifting is done and I can take a breather) or just being worn down by being constantly vigilant.
I'm still urge-surfing, but it feels different because I'm not riding an intense urge ... more of a low-level want/desire.
That probably makes no sense ... but it does make sense to me that "urges" at 3.5 months will be different than urges at one week.
Edited to add: I'm asking because I know from past attempts at sobriety that slips are not singular events, but more of a process. This feels like I'm in the process stream that could lead me to a slip. Looking for ways to reset myself.
Originally Posted by
WhoDey Reflection ... like you, my urges aren't strong enough that I'm worried about drinking immediately, but I can feel a process in motion that could end that way.
WhoDey (and reflection and DD and anyone else feeling a little wobbly) first off I think it's completely normal to question whether you're an alcoholic at some point.
Time really does heal all wounds...we
do forget the pain and the struggle, and we can tend to mistake a long period of abstinence for control.
Add to that basic human nature - noone likes to be different...and you're slap bang in one of the recovery speed bumps we all face.
If my own experience can help -
nothing changes...if you go back and have that drink, all the stuff that used to happen when you drank will happen again...you may have a period of grace (I used to call it setting me up for the sucker punch) but things will return to the bad old days pretty quickly .
Re-reading old posts is good for grounding yourself and reminding you why you started this journey in the first place.
If that's not enough, I think action then centres on two main points - support - do you have enough?
are you using the support you have enough or in the right way?...
and two..changes - has your life changed in any other meaningful ways?
are you still living your drinker life?
are there changes you can make to ensure your life is more recovery - friendly?
it's really good that some of you are feeling the slip before you get out of your depth - many times I didn't and I went walking. whistling, innocently right into the quicksand.
You guys are doing it right
D