Hi SR, I want to thank you again all for your kindnesses, you have helped me so much. And no worries, devastated, you didn't steal my post! I like reading anything anyone wants to share. I haven't been around here in a few days and wanted to let yall know I'm okay and it's getting better each day. After the hearing, I was just numb for a couple days and tried to stay distracted. Sometimes it takes me a while to process things, but I have come to terms with the 5 year sentence for my son. It was his consequence for his choices. I'm breathing easier and feeling calmer about it. I do hate it for him though and wish things were different.
The lawyer says he could be out in less than a year and she has asked the county to consider keeping him in the county jail, but that's a longshot. I was surprised to hear many of you say that the conditions in prisons are better than county jails in your area. Where I live it's just the opposite, small town with a brand new jail. People joke that it's more like a hotel than a jail. My son is hoping they let him stay, but he says he's prepared for prison if he goes. Wherever he is, I just want him to be safe.
Thinking ahead, I wanted to ask those that had kids in jail/prison for months or years, did you let them come back home when they got out? I've learned that to be paroled, you have to have a detailed plan of your living arrangements, so I know it will be an issue. On one hand, he'll have paid his consequences, he'll likely be clean, he'll need help. On the other hand, he usually stresses out the family, hasn't done well here, and I wouldn't like parole officers searching my home whenever they want. I know not to have an active addict in the home, but letting him home after a year of prison is a different situation and I'm not sure how I feel about it yet.
Thankfully, I have plenty of time to figure it out, and I know which way I'm leaning right now, but I wanted to get your ideas and experiences on what you did or would do when they get paroled.