Please be kind to yourself about the conversation. Perhaps apologize, if you feel the need, for what you truly believe you did that was wrong. If memory serves, your son has said far worse things to you in the past, and it seems you have been able to forgive him. If he can't forgive you--that's now his problem.
Forgive me for not remembering how old your son is, suncatcher...but maybe it is time he navigate this world on his own as an adult. I do agree that if he cannot respect you, your home, your belongings nor appreciate all that you have done for him, then it is probably past time for him to move along into his own adult life.