I feel the same way justin... which is what makes this so damn hard. I love coffee. And I don't think I want a life without it. But - I've come to love STRONG coffee... and plenty of it. Dark roasted redeyes.... straight up. Over the years and decades my coffeeholism took a similar trajectory to my alcoholism.... and I think it's taken a toll on my nervous system. Caffeine is a strong drug and a sympathomimetic agent. It's half-life is long enough that you can build up a significant 'backlog' of it in your body until your whole system is just overtoxified and for me that has led to heart palpatations, anxiety, nervous sweats, difficulty sleeping, high heart rate, and difficulty maintaining intensity in workouts.....
I've gotta cut it out and stabilize my system, then see whether I can re-introduce it in a balanced way. I hope so.... I hope that it isn't just like alcoholism; with every 'relapse' harder and worse......