Originally Posted by
Regroup 
He feels that since I left him he doesn't need to prove anything to me..
This is just my opinion, but this statement alone should raise a big red flag and tell you that he isn't serious about committing to sobriety or to you.
I say this from experience as when I wasn't that serious about it I didn't think I had to prove anything either. My attitude was that I was kind of trying and that should be good enough. Only when I got serious was I ready to prove to my daughter that I was committed to it. And it takes work and actions to prove this, not just words.
Set whatever boundaries you need to in order to protect your children and their well being. We are good manipulators. Follow your gut, it is seldom wrong.