Originally Posted by
kdjom 
What else should I be saying about boundaries and such? I am getting anxious about his return. So much going on in my head. I know some of you have read about my emotional affair - that is causing a lot of grief for me right now. It hurts much more than I ever thought it would - and I know that it is my own doing
Good. Good, that.
The pain, I mean.
There is a saying on the *other side* (AA, I mean).
I have heard some of the real achievers say -- "Pain Drives My (the A) Train."
Likely the same on this side.
Congrats first on having the Pain. It means your emotions are working. And Congrats on owning the Pain. It is yours.
I think I want to try with hubby, but I just don't know what to expect. I haven't been to an alanon meeting yet. I need to make time in my schedule for a meeting - hard to do when it is just myself to run kids to their activities. (I know - excuses, excuses) ...
Anyways ... any tips or pointers for what I should be saying during our conference?
Thx
K
Yes. Do not "share" i.e., "dump" your Pain on him.
Shut up and listen to what is expected of you.
You can choose to do that or not -- that will be up to your boundaries.
Sounds like you could use some help as well as him. Accept that and get to work.