Don't be too hard on yourself! I'm sure if you did run into your ex-sponsor he would be simply very happy to see you and not angry at all. Please don't let that stop you! zi'll never forget after a relapse walking back through the doors of my Home Group and the pats on the back for having the courage to come back. I really felt accepted no matter what I'd done. Also the guilt i've felt over things from the past also kept me using, I honestly had to accept that my past is just that , the past. I cant' change it. I can only learn from it and do my best today in order to have no guilt and shame tomorrow. Best wishes, keep coming back \\// peace