Originally Posted by
ashleyjessee 
My fiance was on supervised probation for a period of time..which pretty much forced him into sobrity (from hydrocodone and oxycodone) He seems to be doing fine. He is off of probation, now. No signs of drug abuse so far, however I am a mess. Not on drugs or anything like that, but I am still suffering from I guess codependency issues. I am not better. I still find myself looking around for clues that hes on drugs..sometimes he will give certain "look" that brings back memories of the past. I feel like im crazy and I cant really live my life. I have 3 kids..and its hard to even focus on them from being caught up in FEELING like something is going to happen..or HE will end up going back to drugs. I KNOW im supposed to live my life otherwise..Its like I KNOW what im supposed to do. However, I cannot help myself from thinking that way and driving myself insane. Any suggestions? I need help!
I get what you're saying, but I wouldn't say probation forced him. There had to be some willingness there. My husband was on supervised probation, used anyway, and ended up in prison. He is sober now, but I have my doubts. For me it is more about that I can't control it that drives me up the wall. I don't trust him. I fear that sure he will stay clean... until he gets out.... make sense? Where you are at now is where I will be in about 2-3 years. I've been there before. Trust your gut. Remember: using looks like using, and recovery looks like recovery.