Originally Posted by
2bhappier 
Very interesting to see what I wrote in my first post. Thank you, doggonecarl. And, thanks everyone. I know I have a problem and I know it will escalate if I don't stop. And yet I still do it. Have you all been able to be sober right away when you decided you need to be? Am I being too easy on myself?
For myself personally, I tried to quit drinking an incredible amount of times, with no luck - I could quit for a small amount of time but I'd relapse and then it would eventually get back to where it was before, and then it would get even worse. The trick is to learn where you have gone wrong in your failed attempts and try and use this to quit and stay quit. I don't like using the term "failed" because if you can learn something from it, then it is anything but a failure.
Recovery isn't easy, but it's definitely worth it. Think of it this way, if a toddler kept trying to take those first steps and kept on falling down, you wouldn't tell him to just give up trying to walk, right? We need to keep trying until we get it right. It's literally, in my case, a matter of life and death. And the death part is a slow and gruelling death, and my life will be robbed of all meaning and happiness before the process ends. I have no choice other than to not drink, and I suspect many other people on these forums are in the same boat.