Since I got sober a few years ago and because I have never made any effort to hide the fact that I am an alcoholic and that I attend AA many "civilians" have asked if they or someone they know "is an alcoholic?" In the beginning I shied away from answering simply saying it was not my place to sit in judgment. However that usually didn't satisfy the inquirer so I finally started answering with this simple response.
"If alcohol is interfering in your life and causing you problems, then you have an alcohol problem by definition." I then go on to offer this analogy. "If you have fallen off a cliff, but haven't yet hit the ground I don't think you have to call yourself dead as you are falling, however if you don't stop the fall that term will very likely apply in the future."
This response usually brings a smile and seems much easier for people to accept and I do believe sometimes to feel less threatened and somewhat more willing to look into getting help. A pejorative label like alcoholic puts us on the defensive when we know, even if not willing to admit it, we do have a problem. It seems that many folks just want to be anything besides what they suspect or in many cases already know they are.
Jon