As an alcoholic and a divorce attorney I will say get sober and get some time under your belt, go to individual counseling and reevaluate. I know this is hypocritical of me as an alcoholic very new to sobriety but even when drinking daily I would routinely refuse clients engaged inactive addiction because dissolution litigation and child custody issues are brutal, they bring even the healthiest person to their knees and one needs to have their head on straight before initiating the process. Also you need to be making decisions you will not regret and you need to get your mind healthy or on the path to a healthy mind.
Best of luck to you. You are brave to put this all out there.