I dont know if this is worth starting another thread, so i will state here. I am trying to get onto another board about infidelity. For whatever reason I have not been approved yet, I can only read other peoples experiences. I am finding that one GA-ZILLION times harder to read than anything over here.
I have stated
Since now I not only have an AH, but a Cheating AH with unchecked OCD, how do I keep up? Do you think SR is enough for me? The OCD is older than the alcoholism, then the booze hit and then the infidelity.
It seems that the number one issue with infidelity is a completely open book, total transparancy.
A complete "no contact" rule. (with the other person/persons)
We have agreed on both of those things. It is difficultl to stay off his e-mail, but I am not obsessed like I have been in looking for bottles.
so the open book, and knowing where he is at all times, etc, that is a bit the opposite of staying on my side of the street, so I am having a hard time on avoiding oncoming traffic. Which lane should I be walking in?
I am still not over the shock, of course, and i am cycling between sadness, crying, anger, indiffrence, but most of the rage is gone. I think all of the pure RAGE is gone.
I dont know if i have stated outloud here, this was so so difficult because I was PREPARED for his drinking, i have had a lifetime of preperation for his drinking. but cheating? That hit me like a knife and an ax and a car, all at one time. I think that is why i could so easily STOMP my food, THROW a fit, MAKE my ultimatium and MEAN IT.
We are talking, he is open, he is still at the "open book" phase. i dread that closing. I dread whatever twists this takes. I dread finding out more, but from all I can see, this reallly is a new issue. I hope not to be proven wrong.
Ok enough rambling.
If there is anyone left listening to me, this is a long bumpy ride and only after reading others stories of cheating, I can see why it was so triggering for so many. thank you.