Originally Posted by
copperfield 
i feel frustrated, tired, and hopeless
The silver lining of alcohlism is that it's 100% treatable and you never have to feel that way again in regards to your drinking. How about joining the January sober thread or hitting an AA meeting? You feel like crap now, we all did in the same situation. The best way to feel better is to dust yourself off and do something about it. Self pity will get you nowhere.