Dandylion, I think I've looked at it before. Is that the "some of it makes me laugh and some of it makes me cry" stickie? I know normies don't get it but I don't have any alcoholic spouse friends. I think that's partly due to my age. I think one of AH's friends is an alcoholic too but they're still partiers and childless so its a non issue for them.
Amy, because something makes me feel like I'm supposed to try to make our marriage work after this. He seems to be doing everything he's supposed to do and he's saying the right things and he's (for the most part) completely relenting to me. So I'm supposed to try to get past those things, right? But I don't want to call all the shots. Ugh. I just feel like I can't win here. Both paths are going to be hard and painful and I don't want to go down either one and I don't like where I currently am either.