So had a weird night. My friend is in town visiting. When she lived here she would sit at my bar and have meaningful talks for hours or we would go out together and take shots and talk nonsense. I cherish our long talks that we used to have but now when she's visiting she's busy with family all day and invites me to bars at night. She's pretty much a party girl, (possible alcoholic but not for me to judge.)
So, she invited me out last night "please please please I really want to see you I miss you"
It might have been fine but the last two times I've gone to meet her she's been plastered crying/telling me the same stories over and over. I decided that I don't want that in my life anymore told her "bars are kind of hard for me since I got sober, let's do lunch next time your in town".
She was super nice about it cause she's such a sweet girl but by telling her that might mean that I hardly ever see her anymore. I really care about her but she drinks too much to fit into my life anymore and I don't drink enough to fit into hers. There's a lot of people like that from my old life, that I bonded with people because we drank the same and when I was drunk I never wanted sober people around me who didn't understand. It was more than telling someone "sorry not tonight" it was a realization that for some friendships it's time to move on.