somehow thinking that I want to set the record straight.....
There is no setting the record straight when it comes to addiction. They hear what they want to hear. Ignore what they don't want to hear. And twist words to make them something different than what you actually said. Setting the record straight is trying to "win".....at what cost? How important is it to win? What's the prize? When it doesn't work out the way you anticipate or want it to, what have you gained? Why do we keep wanting to do the same thing over and over and over again......expecting a different result? That is our insanity.
Engaging with an addict in manipulation mode, does that make us a.......victim?.......or volunteer? The first time someone said that to me I wanted to slap them silly. But as Gloria Steinem said "The truth will set you free.......but first........it's going to pi$$ you off." I can now recognize that any time I step foot on the dance floor with my dear son.....I'm a willing participant. I can't blame him for something I control......my actions/reactions. I can choose not to engage anytime I want to.
Sometimes changing our perspective helps. I know that my son doesn't really have problems.......he just has solutions he doesn't like. And the same goes for me.
gentle hugs
ke