Thanks for all of your responses. Although not what I was hoping to hear, I suppose it was exactly what I know deep down to be true
I've had a bit of a revelation the past couple days. I've been doing a TON of reading to try to get a handle on this - trying to just understand it. I came across a blog written by a woman who's in the midst of an ugly divorce and, with the sole exception of the divorce itself, it was as if I was reading a story about my life! Every single thing she spoke of was EXACTLY what's going on here. The blog was about divorcing a narcissist (who also happened to be an alcoholic). I feel like someone has switched a light on! IT ALL MAKES SENSE!!!! It's awful, but it's an answer. How to move from here is still a mystery, but at least the hamster spinning in my head appears to be in one of those balls that roll around now and not just on a wheel going nowhere
