Ah, the catch phrases meant to deliver a message that actually end up giving a person with an alcoholic mind who is trying to quit an excuse to drink.
In the past few weeks I've heard people talking about "earning their seat" and how people without extensive or destructive histories haven't yet, either by their own decree or by others.
Let me start by saying that first, I agree with your thought process. If people would stop using catch phrases and just say what they mean this wouldn't happen.
In the days that I was still battling having to quit drinking my entire interpretation of that quote would be that I still had some drinking to do. That I hadn't earned my seat yet, I needed to do some more research to realize that I needed to be done with it. Boy oh boy, would I take that and run with it when the urges were present.
Now I look at that phrase, purely because I'm done with drinking, and see that they're trying to say that they had been through enough to finally get to the point where they had it. They were done. This is meant to imply that if you can't put down the drink and stay away from it then you just haven't gotten to that point. You have to be sick of it, I mean really and truly sick of it to succeed in quitting. You have to make up your mind that you're done and that's it, it's over. There is no more choice involved. They are trying to deliver a "message".
The message is "You are still drinking so it's possible that you haven't fully grasped the concept of what has happened or will happen to you due to your alcohol use. They're telling you that's what happened to them that made them finally quit. You can continue on and cause more harm or come to the realization now. You need to figure out what it is that you need to get there".
So there ya go, straightforward, to the point, saying exactly what it means. No chance to misinterpret.
Let me add the disclaimer that I am grateful for AA, it's assisted me in building my sober network and I enjoy learning from people who have been through this.
You know how they usually say "Don't shoot the messenger?" Well in this case I'm saying "Don't shoot the whole program".
